New Forum Site Available


New Forum Site Available

I have added a new link to my link section. This link will take you to a forum page. It is an opportunity to ask questions, share experiences, and help others who may consider the idea of having a threesome. It covers, at the moment, three sections. One is relationship, the other is threesomes, and finally the third section covers general topics.

At the moment the site does have the some ability to communicate with others. Nonetheless, the site is not set-up for a meeting site and anyone who makes arrangements for a threesome through the site assumes the liability.

This is your chance to get on the ‘ground floor,’ and contribute. If you are interested, just click on the link.

Cuckolding and the power of sloppy seconds


IMG_8628 updated

Sloppy Seconds a curse or a great benefit?

Introduction

Earlier today I was reading an excellent blog about ‘sloppy seconds’. It started me thinking about my own experience with the topic and how I define it. To begin with, the author in the article uses the term, ‘sloppy seconds, liberally. ‘Sloppy seconds,’ as I understand his definition refers to a  man who is second to have sex with a woman after another man finishes having with her and uses the term ‘sloppy seconds’ that includes using a sex toy before having sex. Whereas in this article, I use ‘sloppy seconds, having sex with a woman after she has, in most cases, gone bareback with another man. Regardless of how the term is defined, it can carry very a negative connotation with it but if you become confident enough in yourself, it can be a very powerful experience.

If I wanted to write a thesis on the topic I can use a more liberal definition by discussing the numerous times we have use a large vibrator and how it felt to fuck her her wide pussy from it. In my opinion, this would make reading about those experiences quite boring. Instead I will reflect on the few times where we have invited another man to join us or to allow her to have sex on her own.

Experiencing ‘Sloppy Seconds’

It is difficult to put into words the sheer excitement sharing you spouse can bring along with the devastating crippling fear too. Nonetheless when it is my turn to enjoy her after another man has been in her it is quite erotic and it stimulates all of the senses. The musk, after sex, smell is powerful. When she has had sex with someone else there is a powerful intoxicating musk smell that fills the room. It is a similar smell that is left on me, even after showering, for up to two days after having sex with her. When I look at her lips they are redden and swollen from already having sex and her vagina is already wide. Then when I touch where she has been penetrated there is a sticky feeling and sometimes back-flow still leaks out. Having sex is quite different. Entering is a lot smoother due to her being wet from cum and she is not necessarily wider. Instead I would say she is stretched, which is a totally different feeling. While I play in my mind the events that just occurred, experiencing every type of possible emotion. From worrying about what just occurred to sheer excitement over just occurred. It is a flurry of emotions that took days, afterwards, for it to settle. From my experience she is still horny from the experience and does not want to spend a lot of time in foreplay.

In my opinion it is easy to understand the negative connotation of the word. ‘Sloppy seconds’ puts the second male in the position of having to compare himself to another male who just enjoyed the woman in front of him. For a man who lacks confidence, it can be quite a daunting intimidating. For the man that has enough confidence in themselves and their relationship, it can be a drug more powerful than any known drug available. The power of ‘sloppy seconds’ can be something that obliterates the confidence of a man who lacks self-esteem thereby destroying his relationship or it can be a glue that cements a relationship. Only time can tell which one it will be and planning such an experience needs to be done cautiously.

Heteroflexible another term for bi-curious?


 

Heterosexual-symbol-3D

Heteroflexible a new term for sexual identity or another term for bi-curious?

Recently I came across the term heteroflexible and for those who may not know the term, it means: someone who is heterosexual but has the ability to have a same-sex encounter without developing a relationship with someone of the same-sex. When I read it, it thought this is another way of stating bi-curious or restating someone who is bisexual?

 

As I thought about the term more, I realized, it was also providing an explanation as to why a heterosexual individual could have a same sex encounter in a threesome and then continue their heterosexual lifestyle. I was beginning to think this term actually had some merit and it was not another term in the cornucopia of terms describing threesomes.

 

Then I thought bi-curious means someone who show a curiosity in the same-sex and wishes to explore it. The idea of exploration without identifying as bisexual, I believe, is the hallmark of the term bi-curious and I believe, is also the hallmark of the term heteroflexible.

 

In answer to the question, is heteroflexible another term for bi-curious or is it a new term for sexual identity? I believe, it is another of the infinite terms that describes bi-curious and it does not further contribute to our understanding of sexual identity.

 

 

 

Watching my wife having sex with another man


sexy wifeThreesome First-Hand Experience

Introduction

Probably one of the more difficult parts of planning a threesome is preparing yourself for watching your wife / girlfriend having sex with someone else. At first, the idea may lead to an instant arousal that produces an erection every time thinking about someone else having sex with her. The imagery and arousal it can generate makes thinking about even the most mundane things very difficult. Then, the idea of someone else having sex with her may seem conflicting. In your mind you ask, how can extramarital sex be so arousing? At the time, contemplating the question quickly ends as arousal once again happens. This continues until the time for the threesome approaches and he instant erections may begin switching to fear. Leading to confusion and a wish to go slower; however, at the same realizing she is beginning to find the idea arousing too. Ultimately this leads to a resolution that usually involves accepting his partner is beginning to find the idea of having sex with someone else arousing and accepting that their relationship will forever change. In this article I will cover two separate threesome experiences and if anyone would like to share their experience, please feel free to add a comment at the bottom of this article.

Couple’s Cuckolding

This experience actually happened first and it was our first threesome experience together. It did not instantly happen and it took months of nurturing before occurring. It occurred while we were living in an apartment complex near downtown, in a rural urban mid-west town. In a state where farm animals out number humans by about 100:1. The apartment complex was only three buildings standing side-by-side that were primarily studio and 1 bedroom apartments that primarily offered month-to-month lease. Most of the people who lived there worked at nearby by businesses and due to the apartments being small, many of the tenants were single male.

Since there was a small courtyard, during summer she would lay outside in her two piece bikini and men naturally flirted with her. After she would come inside, she would tell me about her flirting. Her flirting provided some substance for us and it allowed us to explore the idea of some form of threesome. Due to the nature of the complex there was a high-turnover of tenants and many did not stay long. This did not allow planning some for some form of threesome to easily happen but it did offer the opportunity where we knew they would not be there long. Thereby preventing things from becoming ‘messy’ and complicated.

As time went on, there was one guy who flirted with her and she admitted it was arousing for her. This continued for some time and as she told me about their flirting the flirting became more suggestive. She would tell me that he wants to fuck her. When the flirting became more suggestive it left us with a decision, does it led to something or does it stay innocent? We decided to allow the flirting to go further and to see where it goes. A few weeks later she mentions that this guy wants to have sex with her and agree to let it happen.

When she leaves, she asks me to close the curtains in our apartment since our apartment faced his. During this time I felt quite aroused and very anxious while going through a roller-coaster of emotions. I worried if she was safe and if she was enjoying herself. About two hours later she came back telling me about the experience and we had a great sex that night.

MFM (Straight 3 some)

We both entered our relationship with both of us having previous threesome experience and we understood what we were going to face. She was the one who initially brought up the idea by telling me that she wanted to invite a former boyfriend. Normally this is something that is a red flag for me. In this instance she stated they never had sex and always wondered what it would be like. Plus it had been a few years since they saw each other and from here body language it was obvious she was being sincere.

The time from us talking about it to it actually happening was very fast, at best a few days. It did not give me a lot of time to dwell on everything that could go wrong and it did not give us a lot of time to set up boundaries.

He came over a few nights later. We spent the time talking and having a good time. Then my wife started undressing in front of us and we all knew what was going to happen next. We all went to our bedroom and they interacted while I caressed her.

Thinking back to experience, I do tend to believe I felt a little fearful of what it meant for our relationship but I knew everything would be alright. Soon he slid he long hard cock into her and they went at it for a few minutes. It was an arousing sight for me. Right in front of me, my wife was having sex with another man and it was arousing. I did not get upset and I did not feel any jealousy. He then came and we stayed in the bedroom for a while after that. Then we all got dressed, had some coffee in the kitchen, and he left.

As I look back to this experience, it demonstrates given enough time we remember the good and it demonstrates that not every threesome experience leads to a relationship ending. In my opinion, this experience was about trust and about moving our relationship towards a more mature relationship.

Final Thoughts

Both of these experiences worked out well for us due to communication and trust. I believe the couple’s cuckolding experience was a way for us to push our boundaries and to explore if this was an activity that we wanted to include. After that experience we had our next experience, the threesome. This time we knew what to expect and we were able to make this experience work for us.

I am not, in any way, advocating that anyone who reads this will have the same success. Instead, I am trying to highlight the timing, the emotions, and the result from having this type of experience. It is important to understanding communication, trust, and level of comfort all play a role in having a threesome.

Does introducing a thrid person positively or negatively impact a relationship?


IMG_8702Threesome Impact on Relationships

Introduction

Imagine having a crystal ball with the ability to see into the future or having a software program that can accurately predict if a planned threesome will be successful. As humans wanting to know the outcome before it happens helps us make decisions and helps us decide if the risk is worth taking. However, having a threesome involves a lot of unknown factors and much depends on the choice of the third person. So how do you know if introducing a third person will positively or negatively impact a relationship? Until a crystal ball is developed or a software programs is written that can predict the impact of a third person on a relationship there is no way of knowing. Instead the best that can be done is understanding the dynamics involved.

The Couple – can they cope with change

The impact of introducing a third on a couple’s relationship depends a lot dynamics of the couple and how they react to change. Introducing a third person, even as a one-off situation, will forever change the couple and once a threesome occurs it cannot be undone. Therefore the question a couple must ask themselves, are they ready for the change?

What type of change will they face? It is not possible to know every permutation of a threesome situation and talk about every possible change. Instead the most likely changes will include how the relate to each other, how they react to the feelings they experience, and how they perceive the threesome experience. This means the impact of introducing a third person will depend on each of them as individuals, how they cope with having a threesome and collectively as a couple. It means the change to the relationship may not be good and the impact, short-term or long-term, maybe the relationship is adversely impacted. How the couple copes with adversity will determine if the relationship is able to make it through or not.

The Third Person – Is Compatibility is better than availability

If given a hypothetical choice between receiving $100 (£100) now or $1,000 (£1,000) six months from now, which would you choose? Would you go for the immediate reward or the delayed reward? The above question demonstrates how we, sometimes, make decisions. Sometimes we choose the immediate reward because of its availability instead of delaying of it for a bigger reward later. This type of decision making is readily seen when choosing a third person for a threesome. Sometimes the choice is made because of availability instead of compatibility.

So why is compatibility important? If the choice is made due to availability then it implies there was some form of compromise. There is nothing wrong with compromise provided the compromise does involve giving up core beliefs / boundaries about having a threesome. If core beliefs / boundaries are given up it can lead to feelings such as anger, resentment, and finding ways to sabotage the threesome. This can only lead to problems later in the relationship.

So, the solution is finding someone that is compatible. Compatibility in the context of a threesome does not necessarily mean someone that shares common interests and someone where a bond is shared. Instead it means someone where there is enough of an interest, commonality, and at least a physical attraction by each member of the threesome to allow the threesome to occur.

Does finding someone that is compatible means the threesome will be free from issues? Definitely no, but it does mean the chance an issue will arise is less since the selected person meets the needs of the couple.

The Unknown - Learning to anticipate possible outcomes

Planning a threesome means being able to understand the unknown, anything that is not expected that can have an impact, by planning for it. So how do you prepare for the unknown? There is no way to prepare for every eventuality but understanding some of the challenges that may be faced will help in the preparation. This could be issues like jealousy, anger, developing feelings, or safety. It could issues such as location, your partner’s weaknesses, or past issues. In essence, it is trying to visualize the threesome based on what is being planned along with understanding your history as a couple.

Conclusion

In answer to the question, will introducing a third person into the relationship have a positive or negative impact? The answer is simply it is not possible to know. The best that can be done is looking inside yourself, assessing the relationship, and assessing the third person selected, then asking do I believe a threesome will work? If you believe it will work then it is important to accept the decision, work towards making the threesome as enjoyable as possible and accept that the relationship will change. Should you, as a couple, be able to adapt to change and work through any adversity then it is reasonable in expecting that the threesome will have a positive impact on the relationship.

10 Threesome WordPress Artilces you may have missed


Below are some great articles that you may have missed this week on Word Press and I hope you take the time to read some.

The Zen of Making a Threesome Liberating by Threesomes and Variations

The Power of Threesomes by Dancetinyfox

How to Have a MFM Threesome Without Being Bisexual by Threesomes and Variations

On Being a Part of a Triad by anitrafigueroa

Being in Control Doggy Position by janeseroticblog

Today She Admitted Her Preference for Her Lover  by hercuckhubby

My Out of Control Horny by Monkey in a Cage

The First Mistake by Swinger to Poly

Do You Fantasize about Your Wife Having Big Cock Sex by Love Small Penis

The Worst Sex Face Ever by The Shit Show That is My Life

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The Zen of making a threesome liberating


ready for cuckoldingImagine for a moment, an opportunity whereby you can do something sinfully forbidden, do it with no strings attached, and have sex with someone else with your partner present? How about an experience that involves some risk but might improve your relationship by bringing the two of you closer?  Experiencing such a decadent experience requires the ability to want something more for your relationship, the courage to take a calculated risk, and the willingness to ignore what society teaches about relationships. So how can a couple, completely enjoy a something that is sinfully forbidden and not feel guilty later?

The answer is understanding the power a threesome can hold. To begin with, lately, I have been writing about how a threesome can be liberating without providing much of an explanation. Liberating in this sense means being able to break free of the expectations society holds for a couple and not feeling guilty about it. Also, liberating means to power to feel closer to your spouse by seeking experiences that can bring your closer regardless of our previous teachings about relationships.

For her it means being an equal. Being an equal means ignoring the message about monogamy, what a good wife does, and being able to put aside her feelings for her husband in order to put her feelings first. Having a threesome can mean she is a true equal by being able to sleep with someone she chooses without feeling the guilt that society teaches from a very young age and she is able to it within the confines of a loving relationship.

If threesome is done right then the sexual fulfillment she feels is the result of her relationship with her husband and their dynamics that told her it was okay to feel sexual fulfillment from having a threesome.

For him it confirmation that his partner is sexually desirable and for some men, it can be fulfilling a basic need he has something that others want. By confirming this basic need, it can reinforce the need to keep her happy or risk losing her.

Another liberating aspect for him is making her happy. Through providing another sexual partner for his wife / girlfriend that pleases her, he increases her happiness thereby making him happy. His happiness, in this situation, derives from making his wife / girlfriend happy.

The liberating experience of a threesome can be said to be an experience that increases happiness and commitment to each other by putting aside the requirement that a couple remains monogamous, physically and emotionally, to each other. A couple that is willing to take a calculated risk by experiencing a threesome may find that payment on their investment pays off by bringing them closer.

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The Power of Three(somes)


When considering the idea of having a threesome we want an ironclad guarantee that it will be successful, enjoyable, and our relationship will remain intact. Many of us look at a threesome like buying a new car with a try before you buy or money back guarantee. Some may look at having a threesome like calling a psychic hotline, seeing the future and knowing the outcome. Without some type of guarantee or without knowing the results of the threesome it makes many of reluctant to try it.

Dancetinyfox offers something worth considering and something I have been recently discussing too, liberation. The idea of having a threesome because it offers an opportunity to experience a unique form of happiness. The opportunity to selflessly share your spouse with someone else then bask in the happiness that it may bring through a loving and supporting relationship.

This article, for some, can offer a route to relationship happiness and fulfillment.

 

The Power of Three(somes).

via The Power of Three(somes).

How to have a mfm without being bisexual


IMG_8704After receiving the ‘green light’, regarding exploring the idea of having a threesome, we quickly realize there are many hurdles that need negotiating before reaching the sought after threesome. Probably one of the earliest hurdles that presents itself is the threesome paradox:

Having a fmf means investing a lot of time with the most likely result being the second woman is bisexual. Thereby leaving out the male. However having a mfm may mean finding someone quicker but it will mean an assault on male-half of the couple’s sexuality?

One solution maybe  quid-pro-quo whereby the couple agrees to have a fmf and mfm only to find either they are unable to find a willing woman to join them or the man refuses going through with the planned mfm because it calls into question his sexuality. In this article, I will explore a guaranteed way of having a mfm without male-on-male contact

So, how do you have a mfm threesome without involving male-on-male contact? The first step is changing the mindset. Having a mfm is not about sexual identity. Speaking from personal experience, having a mfm threesome is about sharing and making his wife / girlfriend happy. Arguably, it is doing something for her and the relationship. For his wife / girlfriend and for them as a couple it is about liberation.

This means having a mfm is about an emotional experience whereby a couple can feel secure by trusting each other. By having a mfm threesome the man is giving permission to his wife / girlfriend to enjoy someone else, trusting her feelings will remain for him and she will not violate the boundaries they have set. Also, he is trust the male the invite will respect their boundaries, respect their relationship, and enjoy his spouse / girlfriend.

Final step is selecting the correct male. From my experience, I do not believe homophobic males make a good choice for a threesome. I believe they tend to view having a threesome as a way to have ‘no strings sex’ and can get obsessive about anything that might seem gay. This can create issues in the threesome especially between the males and finding someone who is comfortable with their sexuality is a better choice.

Also I believe there is no guaranteed way of finding a compatible male. Instead I believe the type of male in the situation is a male who respects boundaries, is outgoing, and someone who makes each of you feel comfortable. Then as all of you progress towards having a threesome, they are someone who looks to take cues and does not look to take advantage of any situation that may present itself.

Having a threesome whereby there is no male-on-male contact, involves having the correct mind-set. This involves each man being secure in their sexual identity and not seeing the threesome about challenging their sexual identity. Instead viewing it as an experience that can can be quite enjoyable by focusing on pleasing her. Therefore the guaranteed way to have a mfm threesome without challenging a man’s sexuality identity involves trust, communication, and a desire to share his wife / girlfriend with another man.

 

 

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On Being Part of a Triad


Quite a provocative article exposing the forbidden fruit of having multiple relationships. It is an article that I wholeheartedly endorse and I encourage you to read too.

On Being Part of a Triad.

via On Being Part of a Triad.

8 cuckolding secrets every new couple should know


ready for cuckoldingCuckolding Secrets

We see our wife or girlfriend flirting with another guy and it gets us thinking maybe letting her fuck him would be quite sensual. Maybe there is a ‘hot’ co-worker that you want to fuck but not sure how to approach your husband or spouse. Unfortunately there are very few objective sources of information on how to plan something like this. Instead we are left with imagery of a forbidden act that is rarely publicly discussed and now in this article, some of the mystery is removed by exposing some of the cuckolding secrets

1) Cuckolding can be liberating

Confidentially cuckolding is a very eye-opening experience. I remember my first experience with Brittany. We started talking about the idea and I was fine with it. Then once she went ahead with it, I remember the near crippling fear it created for me and the panic worrying about her. I remember pacing through the house  going through a lot of feelings very quickly. One moment I am frantic worrying about the relationship and what it will mean for us. Then the next moment I envisioning her having mind-blowing sex with the other guy and I remember how the image of her having sex with someone else aroused me. After coming home and sharing the experience with me, it was stunning how liberating the experience was for me.

2) Cuckolding is not like porn or web sites

Insiders know cuckolding is very different that how it gets portrayed. Cuckolding is a forbidden activity that is not mentioned on television, the movies, or in the print media. The vacuum that is created is filled by porn and cuckolding web sites that can paint a biased picture of experience. Reddit,I believe, does a good job at providing a balanced image of cuckolding but it does not provide a lot of information regarding relationships.

Having a cuckold will forever change your relationship. It can be the poison that plummets the relationship into turmoil before finally killing it. Alternatively it can be a sensual wonderful experience that transform the relationship for the better.

3) Cuckolding comes in many forms

I believe it is preposterous believing cuckolding is strictly a fetish or it is strictly a BDSM activity. Instead cuckolding is a very sensual experience that has many forms. It can be:

  • An open-relationship whereby the man remains monogamous and the woman enter in a long-term emotional relationship with another man while preserving her primary relationship
  • A BDSM activity where Domination (e.g. woman taking on another lover) and Submission (e.g. male agreeing and not having sex with her prior to her being with her male lover) is a part of the experience. There can be a lot of variation and depth to the experience. A lot depends on the boundary of the couple.
  • One off experience whereby the woman has sex with another man with her partner’s full knowledge and consent.

4) Cuckolding is not about penis size

I believe it is arrogant to assume small penis size = cuckolding. There is a lot of research that contradicts this argument and I believe cuckolding is a lot deeper than a one-dimensional element, penis size.

5) Communication

Cuckolding is not a threesome and it is more similar to an open relationship where one person remain monogamous. As a result the need for clear concise communication is essential. If cuckolding is going to work then as a couple need communicating and working through any issue that may arise, such as jealousy, is vital.

6) Relationship must come first

Relationship coming first is one rule I quickly learned and practice. Cuckolding maybe the steamy and tawdry experience the two of you believe you want.  However, your relationship with your spouse must take priority. Losing sight of your relationship can put your relationship into a tailspin that smashes and delivers the deathblow to it. Finding a way to maintain the relationship while cuckolding will probably the biggest challenge.

7) Cuckolding can secure a relationship

Cuckolding, I do not believe, can fix a poor relationship and I believe, if couple chooses cuckolding as a way for fix their relationship then it is likely the relationship will take a pummeling resulting in the death of the relationship. Nonetheless I do believe, if a couple has a good relationship then it is possible the result will be a securer relationship.

8) Cuckolding is about trust, power, communication

When you peel back all the layers of cuckolding the core of cuckolding I believe cuckolding is about is trust, power, and communication.

a) Trust

Without trust cuckolding, I believe, is cheating. Cuckolding requires:

  • boundaries are followed
  • cuckolding relationship will not bleed into the relationship
  • relationship will continue

This means level of trust must be there allowing each person feeling secure in their relationship with the other.

b) Power

This will not be a treatises on the discuss of power in the relationship.

In the United States the issue of relationship power is prevalent but oddly, it is not a big topic in Europe. Nonetheless relationship power means who drives the relationship in specific area (e.g. money) and there is a constant struggle for power.

Regarding cuckolding there is a transfer of power to the woman by the man. Arguably it can be said the male is the true holder of the power in a cuckolding relationship but for this article I will keep it simple by saying the woman has the power.

Why? He is agreeing to let her have sex with another of her choice for something in return. She then takes that power to decide who she will pick and how she will allow the other man to fuck her. Essentially he is submitting to her will. Depending on the dynamics of their relationship, power in the relationship may be very one-sided or it maybe more egalitarian.

c) Communication

Communication has already been addressed and I will not regurgitate it here. Instead I will state at is core cuckolding communication can be the drive that improves the relationship by forcing the couple to rethink how they communicate with each other. Cuckolding will fundamentally force changing their communication style in order to accommodate the additional demands cuckolding will place on them. If done right the changes made by a couple regarding communication maybe the behind the scenes reason they appear happy to other couples.

Finally – the secret is

Cuckolding is seen by many as a forbidden activity because of its mystery and potential risk to a relationship. Nonetheless there is nothing to fear if the secrets of this forbidden activity is understood. The key in having a thrilling cuckolding experience is communicating and respecting boundaries.  If you can respect each other and communicate then I can almost guarantee that you will have an enjoyable cuckolding experience.

 

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How to Know You are Ready for a Threesome – The Ultimate Guide


Calendar - Free Digital Photos.netHow to Know You are Ready

The conversations seem endless teetering on pointless. Topics have been covered and gone over to the point as though you are feelings as though you are in a holding pattern. Along the way there have been a few meltdowns and now the agony of wanting to know if a threesome will happen. Now a quandary, pushing the subject may mean the planned threesome fails or it could mean the mind-blowing threesome you always wanted may finally happen. The one topic that is holding you back is knowing if you, as a couple, ready for a threesome?

1) Check your emotions

When thinking about a threesome, how do you feel? Do you feel anger or jealousy when thinking about having a threesome? Maybe you envision a relationship Armageddon filled with conflict, depression, and eventual loss of your spouse because of the threesome? However if you are feel secure with the idea then it is a sign that you are ready.

2) Will your needs be met

We all have needs that make us feel secure and those needs cannot be discounted. Nonetheless in order for a threesome to occur defining needs as either ‘must have’ or ‘negotiable’ must occur. When we give up our ‘must have’ needs then we risk feeling the threesome was a mistake and make the threesome vulnerable to failure. Therefore before having a threesome it is important needs are communicated and agreed.

3) Safety

Safety comes in two forms, personal and physical. Without feeling protected in a threesome it is impossible to feel the thrill a threesome can provide. Being able to feel protected in a threesome means considering topics such as safe-sex and location of the threesome.

4) Self-Confidence

Being confident is vital. It is something miraculously that others almost instantly notice and respond. Without feeling you can conquer any hang-up you may have about:

  • body size / body shape
  • penis size
  • labia shape / size
  • looks
  • breast shape / size
  • personality
  • your interests
  • sexual ability to please

Then it is likely others will feel the same. Therefore it is vital to feel confident about the decision, about yourself, and about your partner / spouse.

5) Boundaries

From my own experience, boundaries do not need to be complex but they are necessary. They provide the spine for the threesome along with providing the joy and excitement for it. Boundaries help minimize the chance of a bloodbath because assumptions were made based on previous behavior or because they were ill-defined. Also definable boundaries help in taking ownership of the decision thereby implying people care enough about the threesome by taking the time to define the limits.

6) Threesome dynamics

In its most rudimentary form having a threesome is about having sex without emotional attachment. By defining a threesome this way it removes much of the dance that occurs when a new relationship forms. Nonetheless it still requires there is, at least, a physical attraction amongst the threesome and it requires all three can work as a team. This means each person must be agreeable to the other and no covert hang-ups must exist.

Finally

There is no formula, no checklist, and no perfect time to have a threesome. The best you can do is weigh the image of the threesome you want against what you presently know. If you can feel secure in the decision to have a threesome, it does not elicit negative feelings such as anger, and feel as though the choices you have made are right then it is probably the time to move have the threesome.

I wish you the best on your choice and hope your threesome is enjoyable as mine.

 

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