Threesome Foursome: Adding Spice to an erotic experience by trying an unique position

Introduction

Planning a threesome? Wondering what position to use? Maybe split roast, double penetration, and watching while to the invited male fucks your wife while you watch is becoming blase. Regardless below there is an opportunity to add some creativity and excitement to your threesome by trying new positions. The plethora of positions listed below are a collection of threesome positions for both mfm and fmf along with a few foursome positions.

Cosmo Twitter After Dark

Cosmo Twitter After Dark regarding realistic threesome positions. It is a good article. However the cartoon like drawings and the descriptions are light-hearted; however the light-heartedness, I feel, detracts from the purpose. Nonetheless, I believe, this is a great piece that is worth the time to review.

AskMen – UK

Cosmo does a great job with article on threesome positions. In contrast AskMen – UK is more pragmatic. Instead of 15 positions it focuses on 7 positions using real-life models along with discussing the benefits of each position.

DatingAdvice.com

The list on this site adds to the depth of positions available. The only drawback, unlike the other sites listed here, this site provides descriptions without video or photos; instead this site relies on descriptions.

SexualPositionsFree.com

This site takes an unique approach to the topic of threesome positions by using wooden figures in various positions.

YouTube – Living La Vita Loca (fmf / mff threesome)

For YouTube videos this is very well done and it focuses on threesome position for a two woman threesome

Finally

Regardless if you opt for a familiar position such as split roast or something more adventurous, the one thing that is clear having a threesome  can greatly enhance for any couple.

Other Articles of Interest:

10 Questions about Threesomes you were afraid to ask

Easing into a threesome

Threesome planning

Suggesting a threesome, what does it mean?

How to suggest a threesome

Threesome Terminology

Follow me

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How do they have sex?

Another well written article by Janes Illustrated Erotic Sex Blog that is definitely worth the time to read.  In this article she provides her experience of being a BBW and what works.

How do they have sex?.

Simulating a threesome

Introduction

How do you have a threesome without actually having it? Maybe your question is, how do you take small steps that safely allows exploring the idea of having threesome? Answer, there are a variety of ways and this article will examine a few of the techniques available.

Fantasy Sharing / Pillow Talk:

Sharing the idea as a fantasy as a part of foreplay, during sex, after sex is a great way for creating an erotic encounter or maintaining interest. The great thing about this is it can be spontaneous where your minds can run wild, it is easy for each person to maintain their comfort zone and it does not require a lot of preparation. A major drawback, it is easy for the line between fantasy and reality to become blurred. Unless the discussion shifts from fantasy to discussing the making it a reality during the ‘cold-hard light of day’ then assume the idea remains a fantasy.

Watching Porn

At first I debated if this should be included in the ‘Fantasy Sharing / Pillow Talk,’ section and I decided to make its own section. Watching threesome porn, this author feels, is a great way to share the fantasy and if the couple chooses, us it as a way to start the discussion about having a threesome. Also, it can serve as a way to get new techniques and ideas for fantasies. It is important to remember porn is fantasy that shows professional actors acting about a threesome fantasy. This means it is unrealistic to expect a real threesome to be similar to a porn movie.

Role Playing

Role playing a threesome essentially is simulating the idea of having a threesome as real for the couple as possible. Before the role play starts a safe-word, a word that could not be confused as a part of the act, should be chosen and used to stop the role play if it becomes too uncomfortable for a participant. Next step involves the role-play itself. It can be as simple as a fantasy description during foreplay using toys or fingers to simulate the third person. On the more elaborate side, it can be an elaborate play whereby the couple develops a scene. The scene can be the woman going into a bar flirting with another guy while her partner watches from a distance or it can be her male partner pretending to be someone else who seduces her without her husband knowing about it. It is important to note, if the scene involves people who may unknowingly participate it can cause problems and potentially put safety at risk. Finally even though simulating a threesome may be arousing actually having one maybe different. Therefore, it is always to important to remember there is a difference between the fantasy of having a threesome and actually having a threesome. The difference lies in the fact during the fantasy each participant remains in control of what happens but during a real threesome the ability to control the situation, to a great extent is lost, since the outcome is dependent on the third person’s interaction with the couple.

Sex Toys

Sex toys provide a great way to explore the idea of having a threesome without actually having one. They can be used in conjunction with role playing or used on their own. This is one area where creativity and imagination can be limitless.

Lap Dancing Club

Attending a lap dancing club is another way to simulate having a threesome but be prepared to be charged money. By attending a lap dancing club the sex is simulated and usually with the client not being able to touch the dancer. It can give a powerful visual representation of what a threesome might be like but again it is not a real threesome.

Swingers Club

There is a misrepresentation that you must participate if you go to a swingers club and generally speaking it is not the case. Attending a swingers club to meet people and to watch can provide a perspective that may not be open to you. It can provide some insight and make having a threesome as real as possible without actually having it. With that said, it is important to agree to boundaries before going and be prepared if approached to politely, yet assertively, tell people that you are not looking to play that evening. If you are not comfortable telling people ‘no’ then you may find putting yourself and / or your partner in a situation that they would rather not find themselves. Finally before going for your first time it is recommended to contact the club. They will advise you and arrange for you to join. Normally a swingers club will charge a membership fee. Usually the fee is to meet legal requirements along with attracting the type of clientele they want.

Soft-swinging

As an author, I debated if I should include soft-swinging since it involves another person. However after much though I decided to include it since it does not involve having sex with the third person and in my view, soft-swinging is the closest the couple can have simulating a threesome without it actually occurring. Soft-swinging by definition means sexual activity does occur but penetration does not. This can be anything from having someone watch you having sex to kissing, fondling with clothes all the way to rimming. As a technique for simulating a threesome soft-swinging can provide a transition for a couple wanting a full-swap threesome but is not ready for it. Likewise for a couple who wants to remain monogamous to each other then soft-swinging can provide the best of both worlds, the ability to have a limited threesome while remaining monogamous to each other.

Posting Pictures on amateur sites:

Nothing can be more exciting than taking a few suggestive then posting online and then reading the comments. The comments then can serve as fuel for further fantasies, give further ideas, and add a few sparks back. If you are going to do the above then ensure the whole process is transparent (e.g. user name, password, and all information is accessible) and boundaries are agreed about how far the experience will go. It is easy to to get ‘taken-away’ by the moment and go further then you might be willing to go.

Web Cam

Some may remember when web cams first came out, the issues with video streaming and having the computer recognize the camera. With web cams becoming inexpensive, high speed broadband, and faster processors the problems with web cams have been resolved. For a couple that wants the experience of having a threesome without the STD / STI then “camming” provides an alternative. Probably the biggest drawback, in this author’s opinion, for “camming” is the risk of being discovered or your computer being hit by a virus. The latter can be reduced by using good internet security software, using reputable sites, and practicing safe internet surfing habits.

Conclusion

The above does show there is a way a couple, who may want a threesome but is reluctant to have a full-swap, can explore their interest without actually having a threesome.  Each option has its advantages, disadvantage, and risks; however, it is up to each couple to decide which one(s) suits them the best.

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• FAQs – Finding a third person (3somes.wordpress.com)
• Suggesting a threesome – What does it mean? (3somes.wordpress.com)
• Having the initial discussion (3somes.wordpress.com)
• Reconnecting afer a threesome (3somes.wordpress.com)
• Questions for a couple to ask the third person (3somes.wordpress.com)
• Understanding the basic difference between wife swapping and threesome (3somes.wordpress.com)
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An introduction to anal sex

Introduction

Have you ever tried anal sex but found it did not work because it caused pain or discomfort? Maybe you tried it and found it was like trying to nail gelatine to a wall? Anal sex is a lot like a fine wine, to be appreciated, it needs to be savored over time, it needs to be understood, nurtured, and allowed to develop.  It is something that a couple can share or be shared it in a threesome. Once it has, it is ready to be picked for enjoyment and the fruits that it can bear can be quite intoxicating.  If you are ready to learn how to grow and enjoy anal sex this guide will help you.

Anal Sex – Techniqe

If you have medical problems that involve the colon, rectum, vagina, or anus then medical advice should be sought before trying anal sex. Also, it goes without saying anal sex involves penis, a dildo, or a strap-on.

The starting point is finding the time when you are not looking for a “quickie” and there is time to devote to foreplay. Foreplay is essential for enjoyable anal sex as it provides proper arousal and by being properly aroused it helps to limit any discomfort / pain. Also it allows excitement to build and builds a bond that can bring closeness.

Once your partner is properly aroused then next step involves stimulating the anus. This should be done using a water based lubricant and it should be liberally applied. It should first be applied to the outside of the anus and your index finger. If the person who will be receiving anal sex is inexperienced then it is a good idea to us your index finger to stimulate the area around the anus before trying to insert it.

As you stimulate the outside of the anus you may feel it relax, which is good and if you do, you can try slowly inserting your finger.  Even if the anus does not relax, if it is lubricated, then you try slowing inserting your lubricated index finger. If you meet a lot of physical resistance, as you try to insert your finger, then stop and have your partner take a deep breath then slowly exhale, have them repeat it if necessary. This should help them relax the anus if you continue to get a lot of resistance then pull out your finger followed by lubricating the area again. Now try reinserting your finger again. For those just starting out this may be as far as you get the first time. If it is do not worry since it is not an issue and the next time might be easier.

If you are able to get your finger inserted, move it around. Hopefully you should feel an anus relax and become more pliable. As it becomes more pliable you should lubricate your middle finger too and insert it. Also this will be a good time to apply more lubrication to the anus. Again, if it causes discomfort then have your partner take a deep breath followed by them slowly exhaling, having them repeat if necessary. Once your partner’s anus is pliable with two fingers in it then it is most likely ready for penetration.

There are two good positions that this author believes works well for anal sex. First position is doggie style with the hips aligned for anal penetration. Second is missionary with the hips pushed forward or raised for anal sex. Other positions like cowgirl or reverse cowgirl, this author feel does not work, for anal sex since penetration is not as controlled.

Once you have chosen the position the male should put a condom on and use a water based lubricant. The condom is not prevent pregnancy since the risk is quite low; instead it is to protect against UTIs and STDs. After the condom has been put on then he needs to enter very slowly and if his partner complains of discomfort then he needs to stop. If the discomfort continues his partner should try the deep breathing, mentioned earlier in this article, and once the discomfort passes then he should continue to enter slowly, stopping when required. Then once he is as deep as he can go then he should begin to move slowly. As he moves he should be synchronized with his partner’s comfort level and if his partner appears comfortable then he can try to move faster. However he should not go too fast because of the risk of discomfort and it should be measure to give the level of enjoyment needed.

Conclusion

Anal sex is a technique if done properly can bring a lot of pleasure to all. It is something that needs to done when there is time available and may take a few attempts before it works, thereby implying patience is needed. The more a couple or a threesome can communicate about comfort levels the more likely it will work.

Related articles

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Understanding the resistance to anal sex

 

 

Introduction:

 

If you wife / partner is resistant to the idea of having anal sex it is important to understand what is causing the resistance. Without talking to her and understanding the issue overcoming her resistance, convincing her, is not possible. This posting will talk about some of the more common reasons a woman may be resistant to the idea of having anal sex and some suggestions to try to help her overcome her resistance to it.

 

Bad Experience:

 

Probably the most common reason for resistance is a previous bad experience trying anal sex which resulted in feeling of pain or discomfort. Since the experience resulted in an adverse feeling she is trying to avoid that feeling again. Feeling of pain is typically the result of not using enough lubrication, not properly relaxing anus, and not stretching out properly before entry occurred. In essence anal sex was rushed and the necessary time needed to get her to relax was not taken. Whereas the feeling of discomfort is the result of entering too quickly and not allowing her to properly relax.

 

In this case the best way to address this type of resistance is to explain how things will be different this time. Explain that you will use a lot of lubrication and will to continue to apply it. Also explain that it will not be rushed, there will be adequate foreplay, time will be taken to get her anus to relax and stretch. Even though you have a plan on how to address her resistance due to pain, remember people generally avoid pain and seek pleasure. If it was a painful experience there will be less of a chance she will try it again.

 

An Ex:

 

Another possibility for her resistance is an ex. This is especially true if the relationship is fairly new, as ex’s can haunt the relationship. There are two common explanations here regarding her ex. The first is that he may have been into having anal sex and it might have been not enjoyable for her. Reasons why it could not have been enjoyable includes having it forced, he was obsessed with having anal sex, or it was very uncomfortable. In any event the experience was not pleasurable for her and she does not want to experience it again.

 

Overcoming this resistance may not be possible if he abused her or it was a troubling experience for her due to the fact she has negative feelings associated with the experience. Since she has negative feelings associated with the experience she will want to avoid to experience so that she can avoid those feelings. The best approach here is you can allow her to talk about her experience to you. By allowing her to do this will allow her to build trust in you, foster developing communication between the two of you, and develop something more deeper than sex an emotional bond.

 

The other possible explanation if it is in relation to her ex is that it was something that they shared and she does not want to share it with anyone else. Chances are that this is not a reason but if it is this indicates a problem in the relationship. If it is the reason then the focus needs to be taken off having anal sex and focus on how to solve the issue regarding her feelings for her ex.

 

Misconceptions about anal sex:

 

 

 

Anal sex for some can be a very taboo subject and misconceptions about the subject can develop. Some of the misconceptions are listed here:

 

• Anus will not go back in place
• Others will be able to tell that she has anal sex
• She will loose control of her bowels, become incontinent
• If her partner likes anal sex then it means that he is gay
• She can get pregnant from having anal sex

 

These misconceptions about anal sex falls into one of two categories: anatomical or misinformation. To begin with the anus is a sphincter muscle. Meaning it is meant to stretch and close. Provided she has not suffered nerve damage, physical injury, or had surgery to that area then her anus should return to the same shape it was before having sex. Also she should not suffer incontinence unless that was an issue before having anal. Furthermore there are two common misconceptions regarding anal sex: she can get pregnant from having anal sex and that her male partner must be gay if he likes anal sex. To begin with the rectum and vagina are separated by muscle. There is no way for sperm to leave the rectum, swim into the cervix, enter the uterus, and then the fallopian tubes to fertilize an egg. So the risk of pregnancy is non-existent. Finally some people have a misconception that if a man enjoys anal sex with his wife it means that he is gay or is hiding his sexuality, totally not true.

 

Addressing these misconceptions relies on education and experiencing anal sex in an effort to dispel them. Educating her about her anatomy and educating her about the fact that no one can tell, including her doctor, that she has had anal sex. Maybe try reassuring her that anal sex would not occur a week before she had any doctor’s appointments.

 

Relationship Issue:

 

Anal sex at its core is about trust, patience, and communication. Generally speaking this author believes relationship issues generally are not the reason for resistance to anal sex. Usually it is attempted by a couple after they have been together for a while and after they have built up their communication. For anal sex to be successful it requires her to trust you that you will stop if she says ‘stop’, that you will not get upset with her if she cannot continue because it is too painful, and that you will not always push to have anal sex. If she does not feel secure enough in the relationship to try anal sex then it indicates that some work needs to be done in the relationship.

 

Take time to build up your relationship with her and build up your trust with her. Spending some extra time with her and letting her know how special she is to you may be all that is needed to convince her to try anal sex. Also, try anal sex when the both of you do not feel rushed and have the time to enjoy the experience. This may mean getting her to relax to enjoy the experience.

 

She is not interested in having anal sex:

 

 

 

Even though the rectum is rich in nerve, blood supply and some woman find having anal sex to be more intense than vaginal sex not every woman is interested in trying anal sex. For whatever reason the idea may not appeal to them and they may not want to try it at all. In this case it is best to let the topic die due to the fact no matter how hard you try you will not convince her. She will have to come to conclusion to try anal sex on her own.