Introduction Previously this author talks about life being a journey and how cuckolding can be a part of that journey. Not everyone on life’s journey considers cuckolding and for others their journey leads them to a full-threesome. Why do some couples choose having a full-threesome over cuckolding? The answers are infinite but this author will explore three of them.
Defining Full Threesome
In order to discuss this topic it is important to define a full threesome. A full threesome is not soft-swinging and it involves maintaining emotional monogamy, which means the couple maintains an exclusive emotional bond even though the physical bond may be broken by having sex with someone else. Typically this is the type of threesome that is thought of when the word is discussed and it means all three are together with some interacting among them occurring. The interacting may not, necessarily be sexual and it involves all three being physically present.
Loosing the fear of pregnancy and solidifying the relationship
Anyone who has ever done any searching online for a threesome may notice there are two vague age groups. The first age group being early 20s and someone in their early 20s tends to be someone seeking a long-term relationship. Also, at this point, women become the dominant gender and means they out number their male counterpart leading to a surplus of men. From a social-biological standpoint, having a threesome can be a strategy employed by the female in order to keep the male interested. By having a threesome it shows to the male she is someone who is not jealous and is someone who is opened mind. Typically the number of times the threesome occurs is limited and the couple moves on to being monogamous. Another potential explanation at this age there is still a willingness to explore and take risks. This means, at this age, the individual(s) may not have had much long-term relationship experience and may be oblivious to the risks involved leading them to participate in a threesome without fully considering the risk. Even if they have some long-term relationship experience they may discount the risk and proceed anyway. The potential result being a successful threesome or damage to the relationship. The second age group tends to be late 30s – 50s. During this time two events occur. First event involves the woman entering menopause. Some will argue increase influence of testosterone increases the woman’s sex drive and increases her interest in having a threesome. Second event during this time, any children in the home is most likely able to stay in the home unsupervised for a period of time and in some cases, may have already left the home. For a couple at this stage, it means there is less stress about worrying about child-care arrangements thereby allowing them to explore this part of their relationship. With that said another event tends to flow from these two life changing events, the lessening or removal of the fear of pregnancy. By middle-age family size has stabilized and most couples will have employed some strategy to limit the size of their (e.g. sterilization, long-term birth control such as NorPlant). Also, entering menopause means the risk of pregnancy decreases until menopause begins when pregnancy is no longer possible. Since the fear of pregnancy is reduced it allows the couple the opportunity to explore alternative sexual practices with lowered chance of pregnancy.
Relationship fixes
For some couples after a few years, the relationship becomes predictable and the reason why they became a couple is lost. This means a couple may turn to have a threesome to rekindle something that they feel has been lost. Unfortunately, a predictable relationship may be a sign of a deeper underlying problem, lack of communication. This author feels, the best way to fix this is to find a way of reconnecting instead of turning to a threesome. Sometimes other things occur in the relationship and the couple seeks a threesome to address the change. For example one member of the couple may discover they are bisexual or feel an open relationship might be right. Depending on the circumstances a threesome might be a realistic solution.
Fantasy
For some couples the idea of a threesome starts off as a fantasy and as the fantasy develops it becomes a focus for them until it happens. Fantasy does not mean talking about the idea, as a fantasy, during foreplay. It also includes watching porn or abstractly talking about the idea. The advantage here is the couple can use the fantasy to communicate their feelings about a threesome and it provides an avenue for discussion. However, the fantasy may lead the couple to believe the threesome will happen as they envision it without considering the threesome may not happen as expected. This could lead to unrealistic expectations about it and it may lead the couple to be unprepared for possible eventualities.
Conclusion
The reason a couple chooses a threesome depends to a large extent on their situation. However, a reason does seem to be a threesome may occur to solidify a relationship or something happens in the relationship that brings the idea to fruition. How the idea evolves and the reason for it will decide, this author feels, the extent to which a threesome will be successful.
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Threesomes and variations 