The problems of trying to use a threesome to add spice to a relationship




Trust is a word that is commonly used in advertising in making a brand appear reputable and in a relationship it is the cornerstone of the relationship. It is formed in a relationship through a couple’s history, ability to communicate, and ability to allow the relationship to grow. Once communication breakdown a couple’s relationship begins suffering, needs stop getting met and the relationship begins to decay. Without trust a relationship withers and dies. If a couple allows the relationship to decay long enough cheating is a likely result in order to highlight to the couple that there is an issue that needs to be addressed.


In an effort to minimize cheating from occurring couples on occasion will look to having a threesome as a way to manage a partner that has previously cheated or preventing cheating from occurring. Unfortunately this is a wrong perception and leads to further problems in the relationship. This is due to the lack of trust being communicated by one partner to the other and it does not provide a solid foundation for having a threesome.


Sometimes couples will look to having a threesome for repairing a relationship that has gone sour, a relationship that has become mundane, or one that is in need of some work. In these situations trust becomes an issue due to the fact both members of the couple are aware that their relationship has issues, they are not sure how to fix it, and are hoping that having a threesome will add life to it. However the reality is the relationship is vulnerable to the influence of the third and it is quite possible that the third could destroy the relationship through influencing one member of the couple to withhold information from the other. Also it is quite possible that the couple will not take the time to work through all of the issues involved in having a threesome, rush to have one, and create further issues for them due to the continued breakdown of communication between them.


On occasion a couple will look to having a threesome due to one partner who is easily jealous, angry, or controlling in an effort to show that this is no longer an issue for them. Trust usually becomes an issue at some point due to the fact the suspicious nature of the person and their reluctance to fully trust their partner.


In any event trust is needed for a threesome to be successful. Transparent communication, debriefing, willingness to immediately discuss any issues that come up, setting up boundaries, and the following of the established boundaries all go to great length in establishing trust. Trust does not come easy especially when it involves having sex outside of monogamous relationship and a threesome should not be undertaken if there are any issues of trust. If there are issues of trust there is a good chance that the invited third person could seize an opportunity to divide the relationship and issues of trust can fuel future conflicts surrounding issues regarding the threesome. Before undertaking a threesome the couple need to feel that there is trust and the ability to communicate should any issue come up. Otherwise there is a good chance that the threesome will prove to be destructive for the relationship.