Fantasy versus reality of having a threesome

Hearing there is a difference between having a threesome and the fantasy of having a threesome is almost like hearing one of those annoying commercials that plays, “Here Comes the Girls,” for the 100^th time in 5 days, or hearing the “Meow Meow” commercial. Meaning, it is something that gets said to the point we tune it out and get defensive when we hear. Unlike those commercials there is a truth behind statement. What does it mean?

A fantasy by definition is the creation of an unrealistic image to meet a psychological need. This means, a fantasy is something that is created in our mind that is based on our beliefs and experiences to give us something that we are not currently able to have. It is something we have control over and it is shaped to meet our needs at the time. Furthermore this means, even though it may seem plausible in our mind the issue of practically still remains. Therefore the fantasy of having a threesome lacks being a likely outcome since it is influenced by us and not those involved.

Whereas the reality of having a threesome is much different that requires the involvement of two other people. This means there will most likely be some compromises along the way and it means the outcome of having a threesome will not be predictable since it is dependent on three people. Also it means there will be some risk and to some extent, a loss of control. The unknown, having to take  a risk, and being dependent on two other people makes the reality of having a threesome different than the fantasy.

So, what does this mean when trying to make the fantasy a reality? It means being realistic and not expecting the other two people will agree with you 100% of time. Being realistic means not setting your expectations based on a fantasy and be willing to compromise, when required. Also it means having a threesome will involve risk, based on the threesome being planned, and the outcome cannot be predicted. This means there will be some uncertainty surrounding the threesome and it means some communication will need to occur in order to make the threesome work. Third it means being prepared for the unexpected since having the threesome will be much different than the fantasy of having a threesome. Finally be willing to consider other opinions and do not become focused on your fantasy ideal.

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